Script for The Harvest of Kairos by Ben Steed
(c) 1979 by the British Broadcasting Corporation. Series created by Terry Nation. This is a partial dialogue transcript for research purposes and is not for sale under any circumstances. Format (c) 1992 by Micky DuPree.
Transcribed by Micky Dupree & Boris Ammerlaan. Proofread by Jason Gool & Claudia Mastroianni.
Kerr Avon Paul Darrow Servalan Jacqueline Pearce Vila Restal Michael Keating Cally Jan Chappell Del Tarrant Steven Pacey Dayna Mellanby Josette Simon Orac Peter Tuddenham Zen Peter Tuddenham Jarvik Andrew Burt Dastor Frank Gatliff Shad Anthony Gardner Guard Charles Jamieson Carlon Sam Davies Uncredited:
Labourer Stuart Fell Leader 1 Christopher Douglas Leader 2 Hywel David Leader 3 Christopher Douglas Interceptor Captain Hywel David Guard2 Charles Jamieson
[Liberator flight deck]
DAYNA Could you get it on visual?
TARRANT Not a chance. Anyway, it's not an "it", but a "them": there's two of them.
DAYNA The readings are the same?
TARRANT Same type of ship. It's our orbit pattern that threw me. Our scanners only see one at a time, and we can't get either on visual because we're in the permanent dark side. Confirm that, Zen.
ZEN The pattern is mathematically possible but cannot be confirmed without an -- ZEN &: [Together] -- independent point of scan. TARRANT
TARRANT Okay, Zen, we've read the same manuals. [To Dayna] It's an old Federation manoeuvre. Unimaginative, but so's a punch in the mouth. We don't need either. At least it tells us who sent them.
CALLY [Into mic] Avon, Vila, respond please. [Static] Nothing.
TARRANT Keep trying, we're running out of time.
CALLY [Into mic] Avon, Vila, respond please. I'm sure they can hear us. [Into mic] Avon, there are two hostile spacecraft in close scan range. Request teleport now, please.
TARRANT And number three is out there somewhere. Dayna, you'd better run a check on energy banks and force wall. Prepare for combat!
DAYNA We stay and fight?
TARRANT With those two down there, what else can we do?
CALLY [Into mic] Avon, this is priority...
SERVALAN What is Tarrant doing? He can run, or he can attack, but he does neither.
DASTOR Madam president, if I might make a suggestion...
SERVALAN [Into mic] Assault Leader One, status check. LEADER 1 [V.O.] Maintaining contraxial orbit with Leader Two. Report Liberator detector scans operative.
SERVALAN He knows they're there.
DASTOR If I might suggest...
SERVALAN [Into mic] Assault Leader Three, status check. LEADER 3 [V.O.] Holding eclipse pattern with Leader One. We're sustaining high energy loss.
DASTOR It's a dangerous manoeuvre... LEADER 3 [V.O.] Request we attack immediately...
SERVALAN No, wait.
DASTOR Madam president!
SERVALAN He's eclipsed, so Tarrant can't know he's there. But he suspects; he's no fool.
DASTOR Madam president, I must counsel that you attack now.
SERVALAN No! No, this time, we get it right.
DASTOR But if only for the sake of your position, your esteem.
SERVALAN My _what_?
DASTOR They're talking below decks, madam. I wouldn't repeat it, but...
SERVALAN You will repeat it.
DASTOR Oh, it's all foolishness, of course, but...
SERVALAN Go on.
DASTOR They...they say you're afraid of Tarrant. Well, afraid to attack, that is. But of course nobody who knows you would ever...
SERVALAN Who says so?
DASTOR Chiefly it's -- one man; a worker from the construction grades.
SERVALAN [Amused] An artisan?
DASTOR He says -- he says any fool with three pursuit ships could take the Liberator.
SERVALAN Oh, he does? And what is the name of this construction worker whose tactical knowledge far surpasses that of my battle-tested veteran starship captains?
DASTOR They call him Jarvik.
SERVALAN Jarvik. INTERC. [V.O.] Interceptor Leader to Control. Request instructions!
SERVALAN Hold position, Interceptor Leader, and wait for instructions from Assault Leader One. We will attack when the Liberator breaks out of Alpha Sector. Four should do it nicely. Well, Dastor, I think it's time we had a little strategic counsel. Bring this -- Jarvik to me.
[Liberator flight deck]
TARRANT Zen, I know the third one's out there somewhere. Can't you find it?
ZEN Sensors report negative scan.
TARRANT Then the sensors are wrong. Run a maintenance check. No! No, hold that. Give us a parallax scan on the alien craft.
ZEN Parallax scan shows another alien craft eclipsed at half a million spacials.
CALLY [In the background, into comm] Avon, Vila, respond, please.
DAYNA You were right.
TARRANT Don't sound so surprised.
CALLY We're getting something from the planet.
AVON [V.O.] This is Avon. We're ready for teleport. [Dayna walks towards teleport facility]
TARRANT Zen, how do we get out of here?
ZEN Spiral orbit zero-zero-one-four, exit: alpha three.
VILA Earth temperatures, you said.
AVON Stop moaning, Vila.
VILA But it's freezing down there! If I'd have known, I'd have taken a set of thermals.
DAYNA Thirty minutes, you were told. If you'd come back when you were told to...
VILA Next time, someone else can carry his rotten gear, 'cos I've had it!
[Flight deck; Vila, Avon and Dayna enter, arguing]
VILA ...and it doesn't help when you're stumbling about in the dark falling over things.
DAYNA Oh, Vila!
DAYNA I volunteered!
ZEN [At the same time] Parabolic orbit one-eight-one-six, exit: alpha four. Battle computers confirm. No viable alternatives.
CALLY Did you get what you went down there for?
CALLY Where is it? [Avon exhibits the rock.] A rock?
AVON Something like that.
TARRANT Zen, --
AVON Just a minute, Tarrant. Zen --
TARRANT Sorry, Avon, we haven't got time.
AVON No, but we do have a superior spacecraft. [Puts rock on analiser] Zen, identify that. If you can.
ZEN The substance is Sopron.
AVON Sopron? Is that all?
ZEN No further information is available.
AVON Analyze it.
TARRANT Avon, please --
AVON Just a minute.
ZEN Sopron is nonorganic, silicon-based, and registers high electronic activity.
AVON Its function?
ZEN Its function is that of a capacity-charged brain.
AVON Thank you, Zen. [To Tarrant] You can carry on now.
TARRANT Zen, is the Alpha Sector the only safe way out of here?
TARRANT As I thought. Stand by to break orbit.
INTERC. [V.O.] Forward sensors report high energy displacement. I think she's moving. [Dastor lets guards with Jarvik enter] Yes, Liberator's breaking orbit. Repeat: Liberator is breaking orbit! LEADER 1 [V.O.] Assault Leader One to Leader Three. Your eclipse pattern is broken. Leader Three, you are disclosed.
SERVALAN Hold position, Interceptor Leader. Assault Three, are you sleeping? Acknowledge disclosure. LEADER 3 [V.O.] Leader Three. Disclosure confirmed.
SERVALAN Then get in there, fast! LEADER 1 Assault Leader One. Leader Two now disclosed and in support. Alpha Sector is sealed. Repeat: Alpha Sector is sealed.
SERVALAN Then the Liberator is yours, Leader One. Audio silence operates. Command Headquarters out. [sees man] Who is this man?
DASTOR Jarvik, Madam President. You requested...?
SERVALAN Jarvik? Of course. Jarvik. Jarvik, the construction worker. What was it now? Any fool could take the Liberator with three pursuit ships. Well, the Liberator will soon be diffusing itself throughout the galaxy as so many billion split particles. So, regrettably, we shall never know. Thanks to the folly of your president, who with her aides and her technical advisers, her battle computers and her captains, extravagantly disposed herself to use _four_ pursuit ships. And yet any fool could have done it with three. Perhaps this particular fool will tell her how. [pause] Well? Have you nothing to say to Servalan?
JARVIK Woman, you're beautiful. [grabs and kisses her]
SERVALAN Guards! Take this primitive to the punishment cells! Move!
JARVIK [guards move in, Jarvik laughs disarming them] Guards! [Points gun at Servalan and guards]
SERVALAN Take him! Will you obey me!?
JARVIK I didn't come here to brawl with the Security Grades. LEADER 1 [V.O.] Leader Two, you are deviating. Re-establish alignment. LEADER 2 [V.O.] Negative, Leader One. Correct bearing on Liberator is being maintained.
SERVALAN Assault Leaders, you _are_ on open voice. LEADER 1 [V.O.] Madam president, this is Assault Leader One, reporting the Liberator's approach course is for Delta Sector. Repeat: Delta Sector.
SERVALAN Don't be a fool. Liberator must exit through Alpha. No other course is logical. The computer projections were unanimous.
JARVIK [Scornfully] Computer!
SERVALAN Re-check coordinates. Confirm Liberator is in Alpha. LEADER 1 [V.O.] Checks negative. Liberator is in Delta.
SERVALAN But he's an open target in Delta Sector. LEADER 1 [V.O.] _We're_ in Alpha Sector, Madam President.
SERVALAN Abort attack. Repeat: abort attack.
JARVIK You see, madam, Tarrant has computers too.
SERVALAN Of course he does. And they would have told him the same thing. The only defensible exit was through Alpha.
JARVIK So he knew exactly where the trap would be. You don't know Tarrant, madam. He's a man. He thinks and acts like a man, not like a machine. That's why he's still alive.
SERVALAN And you, being a similar man, no doubt, in thought and action, will know exactly where he's heading now?
JARVIK Oh, yes. Right now he's heading for the Harvest of Kairos.
[Liberator flight deck]
TARRANT A bit of piracy, we agreed.
VILA Yeah, piracy, not lunacy.
DAYNA You said it was a harvest?
TARRANT And so it is. Zen, put up Kairos.
ZEN Kairos. The fourth planet of the star Xymines in the constellation Lypterion.
VILA Right in the heart of Federation space.
TARRANT There ISN'T a Federation anymore.
VILA Tell that to Servalan. They don't take kindly to scrumping on Kairos.
ZEN The planet has an orbital revolution of fifteen Earth years. The fertile zone is small, and noted for the suborganic growth of Kairopan, a highly prized crystal, which is gathered during the first week following the vernal equinox. This is known as the Harvest of Kairos.
VILA Just one pocket full. I suppose I could retire to the lakeside of Gardinos and be waited on by those cute, little...
TARRANT Yes. Well, what you do with your booty is up to you. We've got to get it yet.
CALLY Zen, why does the harvest last only one week?
ZEN No information available.
ZEN With the exception of the seven days following the vernal equinox, the environment is hostile to human life. Possible causes number eight hundred and two. One: infractional radiation levels--
TARRANT Yes, thank you, Zen. We'll manage without the list.
CALLY What do you think it is?
TARRANT Your guess is as good as mine. Fact is, nobody who ever stayed after the first week came back to talk about it.
DAYNA Sounds like fun.
VILA I'd rather not take any chances.
TARRANT We're not going to take any chances.
VILA But you just--
TARRANT We're going to wait till the kairopan's been harvested, and then we'll hijack the space transporter.
VILA Ah, now, ah...
CALLY Well, that sounds reasonable.
TARRANT I think so. What do you say, Avon?
AVON Now come along, Orac. First of all you say that this is not alive, and then you say it is more rational than you are.
TARRANT Avon --
ORAC I deny that sopron is more rational. Reason is absolute and rationality cannot be divided by comparatives.
AVON Orac, you are splitting hairs. Tarrant, listen to this.
TARRANT Avon, we're trying--
AVON Just a moment. I am about to extract a momentous admission. Orac, this rock, this sopron, does it have a greater capacity for reasoning than you do?
ORAC The difference is barely measurable.
AVON But it is greater.
ORAC By a marginal degree, yes.
AVON There. [Smiles] Now isn't that something?
TARRANT Yes, I'm sure it is. Avon, we're trying to get a consensus. If you could just give us your attention for two minutes.
AVON If it's tactical counsel you want, Tarrant, I suggest you consult Zen. That is what computers are for. Now then, Orac, how can...
DAYNA Do we attack the space transporter?
SERVALAN [V.O.; looking at monitor showing fields] Tarrant won't attack the fields for the simple reason he can't.
JARVIK [V.O.; looking at monitor showing fields] Tarrant delights in doing things people think he can't. But no, he won't attack the fields.
SERVALAN You speak with familiarity, as one who knows him.
JARVIK Knew him. A few years ago. He served as lieutenant on the Kairopan escort shuttle. It was his first command.
SERVALAN How could you know that?
JARVIK I briefed him.
JARVIK I was his captain.
SERVALAN And what crime did you commit?
JARVIK No crime.
SERVALAN Don't lie to me, Jarvik. One word and your life is on that screen. [He gestures for her to go ahead. She enters data.] "Jarvik. Formerly of Federation Space Academy, now in HQ construction grades." [Reads.] Why?
JARVIK Because I'm a human being.
SERVALAN But is that a reason to --
JARVIK And so are you. But when was the last time you felt the warmth of the Earth's sun on your naked back? Or lifted your face to the heavens, and laughed with the joy of being alive? How long since you wept at the death of a friend? [Pause.] Doesn't mean a thing to you, does it, Madam President? You've surrounded yourself with machines and weapons, mindless men and heartless mutoids; and when they've done your work, and the machines have done your thinking, what is there left in you that feels?! [Smashes computer screen.]
SERVALAN [Dastor enters.] What is it?
DASTOR The Liberator, madam. Tele-sentry stations report an approach course for Lypterion. Tarrant is coming here.
SERVALAN I know that. When will he arrive?
DASTOR Twenty-two hours if present speed and course remain constant.
SERVALAN Keep me informed. And get maintenance to replace _that_. [Indicates screen.]
DASTOR Right away, madam. [Leaves.]
SERVALAN The last shuttle is scheduled to leave Kairos at oh eight one five tomorrow, and link up with the transporter five minutes later. The Liberator could be anywhere in the Xymines system by then.
JARVIK Are you asking me or telling me?
SERVALAN I'm not looking for impertinence. You say any fool could take the Liberator with three pursuit ships. Could you?
JARVIK I could take her with one. But as a man, Tarrant is worthy of honour. Three would not insult him.
SERVALAN Then three you shall have, Mark Tens, the newest, fastest, and most powerful in my fleet. Your rank shall be Acting Major. And now I suggest you go and make ready. But first, there is the question of that degrading and primitive act to which I was subjected in the control room. I should like you to do it again.
[Liberator flight deck]
DAYNA Negative scan.
TARRANT Weapon systems?
TARRANT Energy banks?
CALLY Fully charged.
CALLY Oh seven four five.
TARRANT Right. Zen, direct vision of Kairos. Locater fix on the transporter.
ZEN Two two one four. Stationary orbit. Thirty-six degrees. Five - four - steady.
[The rock blows up.]
TARRANT And the interceptors, Zen?
ZEN Eight million spacials, stellar orbit, holding.
TARRANT Activity on Kairos?
TARRANT So they're still down there.
SHAD Get hold of Command.
DASTOR [On screen] Command. Yes?
SHAD It's the harvest, sir. It's been good. Very good.
DASTOR [On screen] And?
SHAD Well, we're loaded and ready for lift-off, but, er...
DASTOR [On screen] Well, hurry up man, what is it you have to say?
SHAD Well, the cargo exceeds our flight tolerance.
DASTOR [On screen] Well, what does that mean?
SERVALAN [On screen] Thank you, Dastor. I'll deal with this. How much excess Kairopan is there, Shad?
SHAD Weight eighty-four units, madam.
SERVALAN [On screen] And are all the labourers aboard?
SHAD No, madam. Do I have your permission to abandon the excess cargo, [Space Command; on screen] or shall I have it destroyed?
SERVALAN Neither. You will abandon the surplus labourers.
SHAD [On screen] Yes, madam.
GUARD Instructions from the Captain. You are to wait for the next shuttle.
CARLON But there isn't another.
GUARD One will be sent for you tomorrow.
CARLON But today's the last day. He knows that and you know that.
GUARD Orders are orders. You know that. [Shoots worker climbing over fence]
CARLON But nobody lives after the last day!
GUARD Then you'll die, won't you?
SHAD Ignition. Contact.
[Launch platform; shuttle leaves without guard]
GUARD No, wait! Wait!
[Liberator flight deck]
ZEN Sensors report shuttlecraft launch from planet surface.
TARRANT And the transporter's position?
TARRANT So, we have five minutes before they link, four while they transfer cargo, less than twelve before they break orbit.
VILA Bit of a know-all, aren't you? [Tarrant winks and smiles.]
ZEN Interceptor activity. Forward sensors indicate standard defence formation flanking the transporter.
ZEN No information. Hull structure similar to ex-Federation Hunter-Killer class pursuit ship. Modified fin suggests primitive Time Distort facility.
TARRANT The new Mark Tens.
VILA You know about them?
TARRANT Oh, yes. Dayna, we'll be counterattacking through the force wall. Bring it into maximum deflection.
DAYNA On interlock?
TARRANT No, overlap. Ask Cally, she'll put you right.
VILA Anything I should do?
TARRANT Yes. Right now, I suggest you hold on to something very tight. Zen, bearing three, standard by eight.
JARVIK Tarrant's made his move. Sooner than I'd have liked, but never mind. Who commands the transporter?
DASTOR Well, nobody, sir. It's unmanned and computer controlled.
JARVIK I see. They still don't trust anyone to bring it back. What about the shuttle?
JARVIK Who controls it?
DASTOR Captain Shad, sir.
JARVIK Brotius Shad?
DASTOR Aye, sir.
JARVIK Well, that's something. [Pushes button.] Captain Shad, I'm Acting Major Jarvik, under authority to Servalan and in command of the escort fleet.
SHAD Hello, sir?
JARVIK Have you guards with you on the shuttle?
SHAD Yes, sir.
JARVIK Good. There's something I'd like you to do for me.
JARVIK I shall expect both courage and enterprise.
SHAD You will have both, sir.
SERVALAN Such old-fashioned concepts, Jarvik. Are they really necessary?
JARVIK With machines, no. With men, yes.
SERVALAN So you won't want to hear the computer predictions.
JARVIK Madam, in ancient times they read the future from the torn out guts of small animals. Two millennia later it was in the remnant leaves of a herb in a drinking cup. Ask me, and I'd say that civilization has learnt a lot to little positive advantage.
SERVALAN Yes. Well, you'll hear them anyway. Our computer predicts convincing victory with the loss of one pursuit ship. I'd rather not lose any.
JARVIK In that case: sit down and shut up. [Looks at monitor] He's left his keel exposed. Killer Three, you're in strike range. Fire now! Now!
[Liberator is hit; flight deck]
ZEN Hull sensors report damage to keel section.
TARRANT The keel section? That's impossible! The force wall... Dayna, --
DAYNA Yes, I know.
TARRANT Zen, retreat. Standard by Six, bearing Xymines. [To Dayna] I said: overlap.
DAYNA I know, but I couldn't find --
TARRANT Didn't Cally show you?
DAYNA She wasn't there!
TARRANT But she was... [sees Cally's empty station] Oh no, I don't believe it. Vila, take over.
VILA Who, me?
TARRANT [To Dayna] Stay with him.
[Somewhere else on the Liberator]
CALLY Avon, I can't.
CALLY It's my mother, my father. I don't know.
AVON Cally, your mother and father are dead. It is an illusion. Tell yourself that this is a rock.
CALLY But it's not. It's alive.
AVON Orac, is the rock sopron alive?
CALLY But it's sitting there, thinking. [Boom!]
ORAC The electrical impulses are powered by a sophisticated technology and the programing does bear a similarity to the mental processes. But this is not "thinking" in the accepted sense.
CALLY It is. It is, Avon. I don't like it. [Gets up]
AVON Cally. [Grasps her by the arms]
TARRANT [Enters] Is this the time or the place? That thing has warped your reason, Avon. It's even warped your notorious instinct for looking after number one. We are in danger, can't you understand that?
AVON I understand that this ship is the most powerful in the galaxy and that you are the most astute space warfare commander. [Tarrant and Cally exit.] Or so you tell us often enough.
[Flight deck; Liberator destroys one pursuit ship]
VILA We got it, we got it!
DAYNA Right on the nose! [laughs]
SERVALAN How did _that_ happen?
JARVIK They fired through their own force shield.
SERVALAN Don't be absurd.
JARVIK You asked, I told you.
[Liberator flight deck]
VILA We got it, we got it!
TARRANT Yes, I know, only I was saving that trick for when they both attacked at once.
VILA There's only two left now; no trouble.
ZEN Sensors report hostile craft bearing zero two zero.
TARRANT These Mark Tens can move. Visual tracking, Zen. Cally, forcewall back, maximum deflection. Right. Zen, --
JARVIK He's rolling her. Hold back, Killer Three, hold back, he'll have you.
[Liberator flight deck]
TARRANT Wait. Wait. Wait, on the turn... Easy now...
JARVIK Killer One, it's you!
[Liberator flight deck]
[Liberator destroys another pursuit ship]
TARRANT [Kisses his fingers to the air expressively, like an Italian chef]
JARVIK All right, Killer Three, stabilise now. There're two ways of doing this...
SERVALAN Fool! [Into comm] This is Command HQ. All pursuit units in Lypterion, urgent call to Xymines sector. Urgent call to Xymines sector, now. [Breaks contact] They'll never get here in time.
JARVIK Just as well, we've got one too many as it is.
SERVALAN No, I'm the fool. Why do I do it? So stupid.
JARVIK Gently now, Killer Three. Ease your way in. Prepare to launch...
[Liberator flight deck]
DAYNA Plasma bolt launched.
TARRANT Visual tracking, Zen. Force wall down, Cally.
TARRANT Yes, down. Starboard roll, Zen. Maximum thrust now. Fire, Dayna, fire!
[Liberator destroys the last pursuit ship]
DAYNA Direct hit. [Crew cheers] Zen, locate the Kairopan transporter. Direct course. Standard by Three.
SERVALAN There's nothing to stop them now. The cream of my fleet, gone! Destroyed. And all you can do is smile as though you'd achieved something.
JARVIK I have.
JARVIK I made it look convincing.
SERVALAN Oh, it was convincing all right. It convinced _me_. Three Mark Tens and fifteen years' supply of Kairopan.
JARVIK You wanted the Liberator? If you're patient, you shall have her.
SERVALAN And what will you take her with? A Kairopan shuttle? A transporter, perhaps? Or will you use your bare hands?! What are you doing?
JARVIK [Picks up Servalan and dumps her on a couch] Lie there and keep quiet until I tell you otherwise.
[Liberator flight deck]
VILA 'Course I may settle down, you know, have kids. What do you think, Cally?
CALLY What do I think of what?
VILA The lakeside of Gardinos. We could go swimming by the light of three moons.
DAYNA Who could? You and Cally?
VILA No, me and the kids.
CALLY [To Vila] But you haven't got any children.
VILA Not yet, I haven't.
TARRANT Vila, you're dreaming. Two weeks of that, and you'd be looking for something to break into.
ZEN Transporter is in visual range.
TARRANT Put her up then, Zen. [Transporter on screen]
VILA Feels like we're stealing a purse from a sleeping man.
SERVALAN They're coming in to dock right under our noses and we're helpless.
JARVIK Be quiet. Watch.
TARRANT [Teleports in] It's all right, there's nothing.
CALLY [V.O.] Nothing?
TARRANT Apart from a few million credits worth of Kairopan. I'll let you in. [Opens door]
VILA Is that it?
TARRANT What did you expect?
VILA Doesn't exactly look like a fortune, does it?
TARRANT You have to spend it wisely then, won't you? Just buy one planet at a time.
VILA [whispering] Yeah. Well, come on, then. [They start moving the crates.]
JARVIK [Observing; into mic] When you're ready...
VILA [Passing guard] Excuse me. GUARD2 [To all] Stay EXACTLY where you are, and don't get excited.
TARRANT Hold it. GUARD2 Don't make any sudden movements, and get over to that wall. Come on, all of you! Right. Now turn 'round.
AVON [Just arriving] Down! [They shoot guards]
AVON They were an obvious possibility, Tarrant.
TARRANT We'll get this one. Cally, Dayna, go and prepare to disengage.
SERVALAN [Turns of monitor] You know, you really had me believing in you.
[Liberator, near hatch]
TARRANT Ready to move, Cally. Whenever you like.
CALLY [V.O.] Disengaging now. [Everybody leaves]
SHAD [emerges from a crate; looks around] It's clear. Come on!
SERVALAN Jarvik, I've given the matter consideration, and decided against summary execution.
JARVIK Very gracious of you.
SERVALAN Yes. There's a certain, primitive element in my nature that finds you -- that wants to. However, you will stand trial. Guards, take this man away. [Guards move towards Jarvik; Shad teleports in]
JARVIK Captain Shad.
SHAD As per your instructions, sir, the Liberator has been taken and now stands off to Command Headquarters. You're invited to inspect, sir.
JARVIK Thank you, Shad. But as another primitive warrior once said, next to a battle lost, there's nothing half so melancholy as a battle won. I never like gloating over a defeated enemy. Perhaps Madam President ... ?
SERVALAN Guards, dismiss. Carry on, Captain Shad.
SHAD [Into bracelet] Liberator, this is Captain Shad. Two to come aboard. Teleport -- now.
[Liberator teleport facility]
SERVALAN Not a disagreeable way to travel. Ah, Cally. How lovely to see you again. [They walk to flight deck] Where are the prisoners?
SHAD Under guard, madam.
SERVALAN Bring them here. And _you_ must be Zen.
SERVALAN So tell me, Zen, how does one operate this craft?
ZEN One manipulates the controls, and the craft functions accordingly.
SERVALAN Yes, and I've heard of your impudence. Now perhaps you will tell me _how_ to manipulate the controls.
ZEN Manual operation is not possible without full pilot training. Automatic navigation and control computers will respond to certain voice patterns. [Guards enter with crew]
TARRANT But not yours, Servalan.
SERVALAN Not mine yet, Tarrant. But very shortly. Guard, that woman there. [Indicates Dayna] Yes, that one. Take her away somewhere, and kill her.
DAYNA He can try. Or he can kill me here. Nobody takes me anywhere.
SERVALAN Very well. Guard, kill her where she stands.
TARRANT No, wait. We'll talk about this.
SERVALAN There's nothing to talk about, Tarrant. I shall kill your crew one by one until you instruct Zen to recognize my voice pattern.
TARRANT And after that, you'll kill the rest of us.
SERVALAN Perhaps. Perhaps not. I may consider a plea for mercy when the time comes.
TARRANT So there's nothing to gain?
SERVALAN Not a great deal, I must confess. Unless, of course, you want to accept my word.
TARRANT I'd rather accept the business end of a poisonous snake.
SERVALAN As I thought. Oh well, I just shall have to watch you break. Carry on, guard.
AVON All right, Servalan. If he won't, I will.
DAYNA No, Avon.
SERVALAN How wise, Avon. You might have been next. Though with your qualities I'd probably have saved you.
AVON Let's get on with it, shall we? Introduce yourself to Zen.
SERVALAN I am Servalan, President and Supreme Commander of the Terran Federation.
AVON Record her voice pattern, Zen. From now on you will respond to her commands -- on this one condition.
SERVALAN _No_ conditions.
AVON Sorry, too late. That instruction has to be completed by _me_. Unless, of course, you care to dismantle Zen and reorganize the program. I should warn you, I'm the only person in the galaxy who can put it back together again.
ZEN Please complete the instruction.
SERVALAN Wait. I'll make the condition.
AVON You won't cut much ice with Zen.
SERVALAN You seem to be neglecting the fact that I have the power of life and death over your friends.
AVON Then exercise it if you must. But kill me, and you will never control the Liberator.
SERVALAN Your skin always did come first, didn't it?
AVON Would you reproach me for that?
ZEN Please state the condition.
AVON Zen, you will obey Servalan's instructions, provided that her first commands are that you proceed to a planet with suitable Earth-like conditions, and that the present crew is safely teleported to its surface.
ZEN Condition acknowledged.
SERVALAN Thank you, Avon. Zen, you will proceed to a planet with suitable Earth-like conditions.
ZEN Which planet?
SERVALAN Oh, the nearest, I think.
ZEN The nearest planet of that description is Kairos.
SERVALAN Yes, Zen. I know.
TARRANT The harvest week ended twelve hours ago. Whatever goes on down here is about to start.
DAYNA If it hasn't started already.
CALLY I think we should split up into two groups.
TARRANT I agree. You come with me, and --
VILA I'll go with Avon and Dayna.
AVON Wrong. I'll work out my own salvation.
SERVALAN However, if, while you were working in the port hull, you'd changed to look out one of the deadlights, you would have seen, waiting for you -- [indicates screen with Liberator] She's yours to command, Jarvik. Under my control, of course. Your reward for taking her.
JARVIK Servalan -- Servalan, if I had wanted a command, I would have stayed with the Federation fleet. And as for taking orders...
SERVALAN You really ARE a primitive, aren't you? Come.
DAYNA What's the matter?
VILA There's something in my boot. [Takes out crystal] Look at that! It's Kairopan. I've just done my foot in on half a million credits worth of Kairopan. Couldn't have happened when I was down on my luck and looking for the price of a drink, could it?
DAYNA Only if you were down on your luck in this place.
VILA You mean I'm not?
TARRANT There's another one here. [We can recognize Carlon] Identical.
CALLY Do you think you should touch him?
TARRANT I don't think he'll mind.
CALLY That's not what I meant.
TARRANT Whatever did that's got a bit more poke than a viral infection. It's also got a penchant for pockets, d'ya notice that? The same on the last one.
CALLY Perhaps they carried some kind of weapon there.
TARRANT Labourers? No.
CALLY Let's get out of here.
AVON [V.O.] Tarrant. Vila.
AVON [V.O.] Tarrant. Vila.
SERVALAN It was still a costly exercise, Jarvik. Those Killer- Hunters are irreplaceable.
JARVIK The Liberator's worth a hundred pursuit ships.
SERVALAN Not to mention the pilots. Good pilots. Not easy to train. You lost three.
JARVIK They were mutoids.
JARVIK I wasn't prepared to see men die on my account. I have this primitive respect for life.
SERVALAN But, surely, if they're trained fighters in a war...
JARVIK They weren't. They were bait in a trap. That wasn't a battle, it was a bluff. It was to give Tarrant confidence. Anything less, he'd have been suspicious. He might even have checked the crates.
SERVALAN Clever. But it doesn't prove a thing.
JARVIK Like what?
SERVALAN Oh, that you're a better man than Tarrant.
JARVIK [Laughs] Why should I want to prove that?
SERVALAN Because I want you to. It's one thing to sit in a control room a million spacials away from the action. But if you're to be man enough for me, to be co-ruler with Servalan, you must meet Tarrant face to face, man to man.
JARVIK A tournament?
SERVALAN Yes, if you like. A primitive tournament, and you will be my champion.
JARVIK If it amuses you. What must I do?
SERVALAN You must go to Kairos and get the teleport bracelets from Tarrant and his crew.
JARVIK You don't think they have enough problems as it is?
SERVALAN Oh, I'm sure they have. You may take a small party with you to make the numbers equal.
JARVIK [Laughs] If it's a champion you want, you'll have a worthy one. I'll put down on Kairos -- alone.
[Outside hangar; the others arrive]
AVON What kept you? Tarrant, tell me, what the hell is THAT?
TARRANT [Inside hangar; V.O.] That is a proto-space-age landing module. Should be in a museum.
[Jarvik teleports down]
TARRANT It's not a space-craft as such. It wasn't designed to go any further than the parent ship, or the command module, as they called it. Now that might have been of some use.
CALLY What do you think happened to it?
TARRANT The command module? Probably got tired of waiting.
VILA You mean when the crew of this one...
TARRANT ...failed to make contact, right.
AVON But you could get this into orbit?
TARRANT Well, there wouldn't be any point, and anyway --
AVON Yes or no?
TARRANT Well, presumably. Nothing seems to have been da--
AVON That's all right, then.
[Jarvik sees Carlon and avoids creature]
[Landing module; Vila snores; Cally sleeps; Avon works; monitor beeps, then stops; Avon strikes it, and it resumes]
[Next day; outside hangar]
TARRANT Where the hell's Avon?
VILA He's back. I saw him go inside. [Tarrant heads toward the hangar]
VILA [To Dayna] I won't be a moment.
CALLY [Entering] Oh, you're back. We were worried about you.
AVON No need.
TARRANT [Entering] I've been looking all over for you.
AVON Well, now you found me.
TARRANT Didn't you hear me calling?
AVON I imagine the whole planet heard you.
TARRANT So where were you?
AVON While you were asleep, I picked up a faint echo on this; it's very basic equipment, little more than primitive radar.
TARRANT And what did this echo tell you?
AVON We have company. Up there ... a large unidentifiable space craft.
CALLY The command module?
AVON Possibly. That's something I needed to think about. But it's not easy to think with Vila snoring.
VILA I don't snore.
TARRANT But you can't tell if it's the command module?
AVON Not without looking. So I suggest you start thinking about this antique heap of nuts and bolts and how you're going to get it into orbit.
CALLY But the ship up there might be hostile.
AVON Quite. That's something else I needed to think about.
AVON We have -- no armament. Nothing to bargain with. Except... [Holds up sopron rock]
TARRANT I don't believe it. All the trouble, all the danger, and you're still wasting time with _that_.
AVON This happens to be the most sophisticated life form that it has ever been my good fortune to come across. Present company NOT excepted.
TARRANT Life? But it looks like...
AVON A rock. Yes. Well, when you live on the permanent dark side of a planet, nobody cares too much what you look like.
CALLY But you said it wasn't alive.
AVON Orac said that.
VILA And Orac was wrong?
AVON Orac is a computer, like Zen. They react to information, that is all.
DAYNA [Outside] Tarrant! Avon!
DAYNA [Trapped in web] Do something!
VILA I think she means you. [Tarrant moves toward Dayna]
JARVIK Tarrant, keep still. Don't provoke it. You, woman. Give it the Kairopan.
DAYNA What Kairopan? I haven't got any.
JARVIK You must have touched some. It can smell it on you. Don't tell me you threw it away.
VILA From my boot, Dayna. You put it in your pocket. [Dayna throws Kairopan to creature, which eats it and crawls away.]
JARVIK Human greed. That's the only problem with Kairos. Everyone who comes tries to pocket a crystal or two, and even if they lose their nerve and try and dump the stuff it's too late. The smell of it clings. If you've touched Kairopan, those brutes'll come after you. They need it once they hatch out. They use the stuff to make silk. For their little cobwebs.
DAYNA It will be back, then.
JARVIK 'fraid so.
TARRANT But Jarvik, I haven't seen you in years. How did you get here? [Sees Jarvik's bracelet]
JARVIK [Grabs Dayna] Sorry, Tarrant. Not the sort of reunion I'd have asked for.
AVON What do you want?
JARVIK The teleport bracelets. That's all.
TARRANT And you'd hide behind a woman to get them? Time changes people.
JARVIK [Releases Dayna] Tarrant? Man to man? You can have the advantage. [Throws knife at Tarrant's feet]
TARRANT [To the others] Wait. Don't move. [They fight, Jarvik wins and holds the knife to Tarrant's throat]
JARVIK [To Tarrant] The bracelet. [To the others] I still want your bracelets. Oh, come on, be fair. They're of no use to you. Is Tarrant? [They all comply except Dayna.]
DAYNA If you want mine, you'll have to take it.
JARVIK [Picking up bracelets] There always has to be one.
TARRANT Don't bother, Dayna. It's not worth the trouble.
DAYNA _I_ think it is. [Walks away]
AVON Tarrant, you've got about two minutes to get that module launched.
TARRANT What are you talking about?
AVON I mean it. Vila, get the roof open.
AVON You're the expert. Cally, get Dayna.
[Jarvik & Dayna fight]
AVON Once your friend Jarvik teleports that's the last we'll see of the Liberator. A couple of plasma bolts will be the last we'll see of anything.
TARRANT But there's nothing I can do with this.
AVON You can get it off the ground!
JARVIK You fight well. But you're still a woman. [They struggle; she tries to strike him in the groin.] If not quite a lady. [Pins Dayna beneath him. Creature approaches. Into bracelet] This is Jarvik. Teleport! Teleport now! [Jarvik and Dayna teleport. Cally runs into hangar]
[Liberator teleport facility]
SERVALAN [To guard] Bring her. [They walk towards flight deck]
SERVALAN Zen, is the Liberator equipped for planetary assault?
SERVALAN Good. The zone immediately below us, in a square of fifty surface spacials.
ZEN Clarify your instructions.
SERVALAN I want it destroyed, Zen. Completely.
[Landing module; Cally enters]
VILA Where's Dayna?
CALLY There was one of those creatures, they teleported.
AVON That's it, then. Tarrant, you have seconds.
TARRANT Strap yourself in.
[Liberator flight deck]
ZEN Surface bolts have been launched. Impact in thirteen seconds. Countdown: twelve... eleven... ten... nine... eight... seven... six...
[Landing module. Everyone vibrating during take-off]
ZEN Two... one... zero. Surface area obliterated.
SERVALAN Thank you, Zen. Now, Jarvik, the bracelets. I assume you did bring them all?
JARVIK Of course.
SERVALAN There seems to be a body in one of them.
ZEN Sensors report alien craft, approximate bearing four-nine-zero-three, approaching.
[Landing module, in flight]
TARRANT Zen will have picked us up by now.
TARRANT So what do we do before they blow us out of the galaxy?
AVON We attack.
TARRANT Attack? We have nothing to attack with.
AVON Then bluff it. Tell them to surrender.
TARRANT But they'll know ... the sensors ... try and raise the Liberator, Cally. Open beam frequency. [Avon closes panel]
CALLY [Complying] Liberator, are you receiving me?
TARRANT Is that a weapon?
AVON That? Nononono, it's purely a defensive. An analogue of something that evolves on the permanent dark side of a planet. A highly simplified copy, of course.
TARRANT Permanent dark -- are you saying you've built --
AVON I've built an artificial sopron. Yes, that's what I'm saying.
[Liberator flight deck. Landing module on screen]
SERVALAN What is that?
ZEN Detector scan reveal it to be a high technology space cruiser. [Jarvik laughs] Hardened self-healing Herculanium hull and superstructure, advanced Time Distort facility, speed range to Standard by twelve point two zero three. [Jarvik laughs] Computer assessment of weapons reveals the craft to have an assault capacity marginally greater than that of the Liberator. [Jarvik laughs]
AVON Self-defence. Some animals bristle out their fur to frighten their enemies. But that doesn't count for much in the dark.
VILA So what does Sopron do?
AVON Sopron is a mirror. A distorting mirror. It reflects a slightly greater image of whatever it is that happens to be scanning it. Zen saw a capacity charged brain, because that is what Zen is. Orac saw a highly sophisticated computer, because that is what Orac is. Cally thought that she saw her parents, but what she actually saw was herself.
TARRANT And will THAT work?
AVON Oh yes. The question is, what will Servalan see, and will she be fooled by it?
[Liberator flight deck]
ZEN We have audiovisual contact with the alien craft.
SERVALAN Put them up, Zen. Tarrant.
TARRANT [On screen] 'fraid so, Servalan. And you know what we want. You have one minute to hand over the Liberator. Failing that, we shall blast her into nether space.
SERVALAN We have one of your friends aboard.
TARRANT [On screen] Yes. I'm sorry, Dayna.
JARVIK Servalan, you can't take this seriously.
SERVALAN One minute?
TARRANT [On screen] And we're already counting.
JARVIK Servalan, it's a bluff. You can see what it is.
SERVALAN Zen, visual of the alien craft. Explain the conflict.
ZEN The visual image is at variance with seventy-two scanning devices. Possible explanation is a holographic projection designed to disguise the craft's true appearance.
JARVIK Servalan, forget your computers. Please! Believe your eyes. Just for once.
SERVALAN Zen, are there any Federation space craft in teleport range?
ZEN Affirmative. The Kairopan transporter, bearing one one--
SERVALAN All right. Prepare to evacuate.
JARVIK This is madness!
SERVALAN Captain Shad, kill her.
JARVIK No, wait. There's no need to -- [stands between Shad and Dayna] Argh.
DAYNA Kill me and who operates the teleport?
DAYNA Avon has the key.
[Space; V.O.'s from Landing module]
VILA Are you sure you can dock this thing?
TARRANT I hadn't really considered it.
TARRANT I thought we'd be dead by now.
[Liberator flight deck]
DAYNA They've all gone. Except Jarvik. And he's not going anywhere anymore.
TARRANT A waste. He was a special sort of man.
AVON Spare us the eulogy. He was a Federation thug.
TARRANT No. No, that isn't what he was.
AVON Zen. Servalan's voice pattern: erase it.
TARRANT Get us out of here. I've had enough of this place.
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